Hello hello!!
The marshmallows lasted
me approx. 3 weeks. My friend M sent them to me for my birthday.
Angel. I was very good, I promise! Haha. They came at just the right
time, needed some cheering up! I'm currently in Whanganui (look me up
on google maps!), south-west bay of North Island, for three weeks.
I'm working in exchange for accommodation, but there's no schedule –
apart from the weekends – so I'm just drifting around during the
week waiting around until I'm needed. Bit annoying really. I'm
housekeeping at the weekends, but Monday-Friday I guess I'm a bit of
everything: reception, laundry, gardener... I thought the hostel
would be busier right now. I know it's winter, but assumed there'd be
more long-termers, but as my friend Sarah says, there's no jobs so
why would they stay?
I haven't written in
four months and for that I apologise. I've started writing plenty of
times and then, weirdly, gotten writers block or distracted. Weirdly,
because this is my life I'm talking about! I believe when I last
wrote, I was leaving Wellington to go to Napier, to go and live in a
prison – working in exchange for accommodation like I am at the
moment. So let me backtrack to 4 months almost today (12th
April) when I took my bus journey up north.
I'd been out the night
before, another Friday drinks Meet-up group event, where we all had
to “dress smart”. I wore my interview dress, safety-pinned
together at the v because it's actually fairly cleavage-y. At home, I
wear long sleeved tops under it, but as I was going out, I went
without. The night was fun. We had drinks and some dinner in the
crafty tavern as usual, and then we moved onto a club. It was the
same one where I'd learnt to line dance on Wednesday. I made a few
friends that night, a shame really as I knew I was leaving the next
day. Around midnight, I realised I had to leave. My bus was at 7am,
and I still had to finish packing my bag. I went to the bathroom,
camera in hand so I didn't lose it, and then got some water from the
bar. On the way back to my friends, I realised my camera was missing.
It had only been about 5 minutes since I'd been in there, surely it'd
still be in the same place – on top of the toilet roll dispenser.
Hygenic. Hmm. But no. Nowhere. I was tipsy, so I'm going to blame
myself for it all. I asked at the bar, friends helped me look and ask
people. But someone must've taken it. All I was thankful for, was
that I'd uploaded my recent pictures only a few days before. But the
loss was hard. I'd bought it for myself as a Christmas present, £130
give or take a few pounds. About $250. No wonder someone just nabbed
it.
Next morning, I got
lazy. I walked to the bottom of the hill from the hostel with all my
stuff and then hailed a cab. I had planned to go to the Taranaki
street stop as it was closer, but decided on the one at Bunny street
– the main stop. On arrival at 6.35am, I checked my bus
confirmation email again. Not 7am. 7.30am. I was almost an hour
early, and, instead of getting in the way of other buses leaving
before mine, I went into the closest, warmest place available to
wait: McDonald's. I did get breakfast in there. A 6 hour bus journey
ahead of me, I'd packed a lunch. But when I'd left the hostel, I was
too early for the provided free breakfast. At least this is my
excuse. Finding no empty tables, I sat with a girl my age. Megan, a
student in Wellington, was heading to Hastings, the town before
Napier (by 15-20 miles). A buddy for the bus. I'd had that with my
friend P on a few weeks before, but it was fun to know I knew someone
on the same bus going the same way. We both got seats right at the
front to ourselves the whole way. We did chat a bit, but then I fell
asleep and she was on her computer. I have met up with Megan twice
since then. Once in Napier and once in Wellington. She was in London
for almost a month in that time too; her girlfriend also lives over
there.
Upon arrival in Napier,
I was met by my new boss at the bus station with a bright blue car
(with it's own eyelashes over the lights). Marion, was Scottish! I
was so surprised! From Strathaven, she has now lived in NZ for over
30 years and is now officially a citizen (as of July). Marion drove
us the long way back to the prison, showing me her favourite vegan
café – one I still haven't managed to visit – and the sex shop
that, at the time, was selling legal highs. Just in case I was
interested.
Upon arrival to the
prison, I met Magie, a Chinese girl who had been at the prison for
almost a year. The prison is more of a long-term
accommodation/working place to me now. I'm still in touch with one
person that was only there for a week – Facebook is amazing like
that – but everyone else, they were there at least three weeks of
the same time I was. I met Nalendra too. He's from Sri Lanka but is
studying in Napier and is part of the technical genius behind the
websites we had. My room in the prison was the Conjugal Unit, and for
the first few hours, because everyone was working, I stayed in my
room and watched TV on my laptop. I didn't socialise that first
night. I was exhausted from lack of sleep, ate my leftovers from
lunch from dinner and went to bed early. Next day, I met Sarah from
Canada. She was boisterous and loud and her accent took a bit of
getting used to. It was the same with Nalendra, he spoke quietly at
first but I understood more as time went on.
Monday 14th
was my first day at work. But it wasn't only my first day, it was
also Nick's. Nick, who is from Yorkshire, had accepted the job the
week before, but as he'd already paid a week in advance at the hostel
in Napier, he'd opted to stay there instead. We trained with Magie as
she pretended to be curious customers – it was a quiet day – and
showed us how to use the audio devices. I was given all the login
information for the social media – Facebook, twitter, etc., - and
Marion also told me that, as well as receptionist, I would act as
tour guide for schools coming in, and my first one would be in three
weeks. Scary! At ODE, I'd never been given the chance to be a
birthday party guide – the only time you take groups around. So
this, to me, was exciting! I had a lot to learn.
Next day, I had all
sorts of duties. I was to give 3 hours a day, six days a week in
exchange for accommodation and free, unlimited wifi. That day, I
folded laundry, I made slop and volunteered myself and Nick to dress
up for a TV show that night. My slop was so 'good' that Marion took
some home for dinner. So we dressed ourselves up in white costumes,
painted our faces white with black eyes and lips. It was a Taiwanese
programme, showing the top ten visitor attractions in New Zealand.
And we were one of them. The presenter was to be locked up, thrown
around, screamed at and scared. Nick was to talk to him through a
wall where two cells are together, and I was to scare him. I hid
under a blanket in cell 19, one of the solitary cells made up with
chains of the walls and dark paint on the walls. When he came in, he
was chained up, the camera crew came in, and the guard, Ian, left him
there. He spotted me and I slowly came towards him, attacked him and
tried to bite him before they yelled cut. I was nominated scariest
person of the night. The guy thought I was an actress. I knew at once
I was going to enjoy living at the prison.
For the first few
weeks, I just explored, baked – Nick's birthday – and tried
looking for a job. I'd been to the local “spa” with Sarah and
Nick on his birthday as well. What is the point of an absolutely
freezing cold swimming pool? I only stayed in the cold part 10
minutes with Sarah before I had to go and sit in the jacuzzi to warm
up. There was another warm pool, but it was fairly crowded!
We had a cat at the
prison called Basil. She is apparently a ghost cat. She was
apparently brought to the prison with a prisoner of the same name. A
man who had half of his face melted in a house fire. Anyway, she was
brought here and after he died, never left. Or so the stories say.
Old prisoners have come back to see the place and are surprised she's
still here!
| Basil |
My first tour wasn't as
bad as I thought. I memorised a lot of the information, but kept a
sheet of paper in my pocket with names of particular prisoners and
their stories. Some of the Maori spelling was hard to remember at
first. For example there's Keriopa Te Rau, who killed a German
missionary called Karl Volkner after a group of missionaries killed
his family. Believing that Volkner was the last to see his family
alive, after he hung the man, he ate his eyeballs as he believed they
contained the souls of his children. He was then known as the
eye-eater and was hung at Napier towards the end of the 19th
century. He was recently been exonerated of all crimes. Only over 100
years too late!
The tours were fun. I'd
do the tour – maybe 45 minutes – and then games. I'd start off
with wink murder before the tour and then finish with a scavenger
hunt with clues and lollies as prizes. We'd finish with finger
printing and dressing up as prisoners. I'd dress up for each tour,
the white bloody lab coat or the orange jump suit, and would make
myself scarier for older or adult groups.
| Dressing up for an adult ghost tour |
I'd told Marion that
I'd stay for at least two months. I applied to a ton of jobs on SEEK,
not hearing back from many. I did phone interviews for Kathmandu, not
expecting to hear back. Only then, I did. I went in for a formal
interview with Donna, who was in charge of both the Hastings and
Napier stores. She called up Magie as a reference the next day. I
would want Magie to be my reference forever. She was brilliant. I'd
also left my number with a local Italian restaurant who were looking
for part-time staff. I went for an interview with the owner, Tony,
and, after asking me a few questions about myself, he told me on the
spot I had the job.
Around that time, my
friend Daniel (from wine tasting) came for a visit. He was at the
hostel in town two or three nights, but I really only saw him once.
After doing my hours at the prison, we went for a coffee. He was
carrying his mug of coffee from the hostel, which I found hilarious.
We walked around for a bit and talked, but it wasn't the same as when
we'd spent that entire day together at Blenheim. I bumped into him
twice again, before and after my interview at Tony's, but although I
offered, he never visited at the prison.
Soon enough, it was
May. I started to work at Kathmandu three days a week, and worked
three nights at the restaurant, plus eighteen hours a week at the
prison. I didn't have a lot of spare time, mostly evenings. Sarah
left in May for Australia. She was there before NZ and friends, a
boyfriend and the possibility of a paid job over there. We had a
leaving do for her and I made a massive chocolate cake – my first
of many.
| Sarah's (Canada) leaving do and the chocolate cake! |
While doing the social
media for the prison, I'd added lots of Napier businesses to follow
on Facebook and twitter. One of them was the local theatre, and on
seeing that they had a competition, I entered under my own name –
and won! I won four tickets to see a comedy show just a few days
after Sarah left. Magie couldn't make it, Nalendra and Ireka were
busy, so Nick, Bonnie (Marion's daughter), her husband and I all
went. I have to say, NZ comedian's aren't very funny. After being to
a lot of the free events at least year's Edinburgh Fringe festival,
I'd seen bad comedians before. This guy only became funny when he got
someone else on stage to be him!
Nalendra's wife Ireka
arrived at the beginning of May. Quiet at first, she soon got used to
us! She had the same degree as Nalendra – another brain with
computers – so she does the technical side of things in the office
too. Ireka is a great cook. Everything she makes is fresh, served up
with masses of rice. It always smells good and I said more than once
I wanted her recipes. I don't think she has any, she just does it all
from scratch! Magie also left, and I was sad to see her go. She'd
gotten a job in Queenstown, with a shop who could sponsor her to
extend her visa. I made Magie the chocolate cake again, it's a good
recipe!!
All this time, we had a
cleaner called Taijin. He was from South Korea and seemed to hate us.
He was nice at first, we'd say hello in the corridors and if we were
cooking together in the kitchen. But he never came into the TV room
to clean. That was, apart from the kitchen, our only social space
where the visitors couldn't come in. All of our rooms had to be
locked with a chain on the inside between the hours of 9-5. Visitors
are curious creatures, and tried to force themselves into my room on
more than one occasion. Sarah used to get me to lock her in her room
at night, so she could sleep in without being disturbed – and then
would call the office when she wanted out! We also only had one
shower, in a building in the front yard, which gave us only 5 minutes
of hot water. Again, we could only use shower before 9 and after 5 as
otherwise visitors could get in. And that would be embarrassing!
Taijin tried to get in and clean once when I was in, I had to yell
“occupied!” at the top of my voice. Taijin, after I'd been there
a few weeks, started to get angry with the world. His room and mine
had a wall in common, so I could hear him in his room. He used to
bang and yell, slam his door, move furniture around... at 2am. A few
weeks of this and Magie gave him a warning. He tried moving his
things into one of the suicide watch cells, but soon moved back. We
think he must've been haunted! He left soon after the warning. One
day he said he was going to leave, and then left in the middle of the
night. Creepy.
After that, we had a
few cleaners, but nobody stayed for very long. In the end we all
started to pitch in with the duties. Our next newbie was Sarah.
Another Sarah! Complicated? At least they weren't staying at the same
time. This Sarah is from the USA and has become a really great friend
to me. We've had lots of long talks, discussions, adventures and fun
together over the past few months. We both count ourselves as great
matchmakers too!
Just after she arrived,
I found out from my Dad that my Grandpa died. I didn't really know
Grandpa Pip, the grandparent who cared more about his second family
than his first. I remember meeting him maybe once a year as a child,
our last meeting being probably around ten years ago. I remember
spending a day at the seaside with him, his wife Avis and her
granddaughter who was the same age as me when I was seven. The next
time we spent time together was when I was 12, where Avis, Grandpa
Pip and I had driven 100 miles to go and check out a second hand
clarinet – of which he went halves with me. I didn't really know
him, but I still respected him. In the past eight years or so, my
grandpa, who never wanted to be called grandpa, only “Pip”,
started deteriorating and eventually forgot his entire family. To not
know him very well yet still miss him is an odd feeling. My dad told
me via Skype. I could see how upset he was and it made me more upset
to realise I couldn't be there for him in person or attend the
funeral. My little sister made it down though.
The next day, I
received an email from F in Sweden. I'd written him a letter a few
weeks before and it had only just gotten to him. I'd asked if he
still wanted to meet up half way when I'd come home. It was still a
long way off, but I'm full of travel ideas all the time now, so I had
suggested it to him again. We said we would in January when we were
together, but I guess my being in New Zealand and he in Sweden was
too far to imagine a future together. We had six weeks together in
Edinburgh before I left, short but sweet I guess. When he wrote, he
said that I was imagining a future that probably wouldn't happen. So
much for meeting for a coffee when I'm back then. When I left, I
guess I supposed myself still half in a sort of relationship with him
instead of single, so to be suddenly completely available was a
strange concept to me. I admit, I did cry over the loss, as I knew
we'd not be keeping in touch as we'd promised. Will he be my friend
again when I go home? I don't know. Sarah and Nick were really
supportive, I'm really happy to count them both as good friends.
On Sarah's first or
second night at the prison, she was also offered a spot on the scare
team. To dress up and hide in dark corners and scare the visitors
coming around at night. I was official photographer so didn't dress
up. I made a competition via Facebook for two people to come and join
in with the scare team a few weeks before, and that was pretty
successful, so I was happy to join in again in that capacity. The
first group were a bunch of school girls who got so freaked out, but
other adult groups really didn't get into it. I had a blogger and her
partner come around that night too, they didn't seem to get into it
either. On tour nights, those of us not involved hide in the TV room, watching a move with the lights off. The screams of the tour are creepy at first but then, as you know what they're seeing, it just becomes the norm!
| Sarah (USA) dressed up for a scare tour |
Next came Dawn. Dawn is
from Singapore and, I don't think, had really ever experienced the
cold before coming here! In Kathmandu, I had a great staff discount.
At first, I was given ten vouchers to give to friends and family.
Unfortunately, Dawn wasn't around for that, so towards the end of my
job in June, I would get her to give me things she wanted and then I
would get them with my discount, we'd have a coffee and then head
back up to the prison together.
Our first big adventure
came in June after I'd been working 17 days in a row with no break
from any of my three jobs, and then the night before I'd had
heartburn all night and had been kept awake by it. I blame my
intolerance – it would be so easy just to drink a glass of milk,
but no! I tried everything and passed out around 5am. Next day I was
in two minds of whether to go. I'd told Nick that if it was a
horrible day, I wanted my day off to be spent curled up somewhere
warm, watching a marathon of game of thrones. I, however, felt much
better after my shower. The heartburn was still there, but I wasn't
going to let it spoil my day. One of the ladies at Kathmandu had
given me some suggestions on where to go.
We set off around 11,
just Nick, Sarah and I. Our destination: the longest place name in
the world!Dawn was working until 12. First we visited the farmer's
market in Napier. The main was on Saturdays, but as this was Sunday,
it was just a small portion plus other people selling their wares. I
got a large bag of mandarins for $5 and Sarah and I both got a bag of
cinnamon donuts. Our plan was to go along the road towards Cape
Kidnapper's. There's a small beach there as well as a small organic
café where we had breakfast. We'd planned to go and visit some
vineyards, but on driving back along the road towards Hastings, we
were sad to see that most of them were closed. We visited the end of
the farmers market in Hastings. I got some venison sausage and a
fruit smoothie, which almost cured my heartburn.
| Sarah on the first beach near Cape Kidnappers |
We went back to Napier
to pick up Dawn, and soon we were on our way again. The fab four! Our
next stop was the centre of Hastings. We posed with the signs on shop
windows, sat on fake sheep and played on the train tracks – which
in Hastings go straight through a pond! We decided we'd stop by
Havelock North on our way down to the longest name: to the honey
factory we went! We had a look at bees, dressed up as bees and tasted
honey. I bought some fancy blue blossom honey – there were at least
ten types to choose from!
On our way at last to
the longest name! Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateapokaiwhenuakitanatahu!
I was navigator in the front. We took the main road towards the southernmost part of Hawkes Bay and then turned off towards the sea, down and up and round hills that all looked like Hobbiton, through dark forests, to, finally – the longest name! It's a hill, but we didn't climb it. We didn't really know where to start, and since it was coming up to dusk didn't want to chance it. The main attraction is the sign itself. So we took our photos with it, sitting on the sign, jumping near it, waving our arms! I had to use Sarah's chair to climb up onto the sign, not very good at hauling myself up! Afterwards, we went to the nearest beach and watched part of the sunset before hopping back in the car and heading home. I sat in the back and quickly fell asleep! I woke up in Havelock North, completely forgetting that we said we'd stop in this Irish/English pub on the way home: The Rose and Shamrock. We had mulled wines in front of the fire. It's a great pub, reminded me of home straight away. Dark wood seats and tables, big fire, friendly staff. We shared a food platter and chatted away before heading home. I call it home and really it is. It is the only place, thus far, that I have spent longer than 12 days. I actually spent just under three months there.
I was navigator in the front. We took the main road towards the southernmost part of Hawkes Bay and then turned off towards the sea, down and up and round hills that all looked like Hobbiton, through dark forests, to, finally – the longest name! It's a hill, but we didn't climb it. We didn't really know where to start, and since it was coming up to dusk didn't want to chance it. The main attraction is the sign itself. So we took our photos with it, sitting on the sign, jumping near it, waving our arms! I had to use Sarah's chair to climb up onto the sign, not very good at hauling myself up! Afterwards, we went to the nearest beach and watched part of the sunset before hopping back in the car and heading home. I sat in the back and quickly fell asleep! I woke up in Havelock North, completely forgetting that we said we'd stop in this Irish/English pub on the way home: The Rose and Shamrock. We had mulled wines in front of the fire. It's a great pub, reminded me of home straight away. Dark wood seats and tables, big fire, friendly staff. We shared a food platter and chatted away before heading home. I call it home and really it is. It is the only place, thus far, that I have spent longer than 12 days. I actually spent just under three months there.
| Sarah and I in Hastings (train track through the pond!) |
| Dawn, me and Nick on the longest name sign!! |
| Beach time! |
| Beachy beach time! |
Christmas time was upon
us. In NZ right now, it's winter, and what's winter without
Christmas? So, exactly six months after normal Christmas, we would
have our own - 25th June. We were going to do a potluck
Christmas, and I miraculously had the day off from all jobs. The day
before, we'd had the arrival of Mark. Another Yorkshire lad (like
Nick). In fact, I think they've worked out, that as the crow flies,
they live 20 or so miles apart at home! Small world. Mark has also
become a good friend, and he reminds me a lot of my friend Paul from
home. When he arrived, I thought he was just another visitor til we
were introduced. I told him about Christmas the next day, and told
him it was potluck, and we'd all be cooking a dish. I think I half
forced him into contributing (snacks and dips). Another Yorkshire guy
that doesn't cook, I thought, ha!
Christmas was great.
I'd spent the day exploring one of the roads at the top of the hill
and had a really old graveyard and the botanical gardens. A good day
exploring, so much that I was a bit late starting cooking! Nalendra
was working and we thought we'd probably have to start without him,
but in the end, our cooking times varied and we did all end up eating
together. I made two roast chickens. It was cheaper to buy two than
get one really. Besides, leftovers are always welcome! I was so
stuffed. Sarah made eggnog. Mine was with oat milk, and with oat
milk, didn't really come out a nice colour – more like a light
beige! But it tasted good! Thick, creamy, and the first time I've
ever liked whisky! Some Scot I am! We had eggnog, mojitos (also made
by Sarah) and huge plates of food. I'd gotten Christmas films for the
occasion.
| Sarah preparing eggs |
| Mark helping out |
| Christmas dinner!!! |
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| Sarah, me, Mark, Ireka, Nalendra, Nick and Dawn |
During June, I'd decided I was going to go back down to Wellington, try and get a job and stay there to save up money. I had a skype viewing for a flat and had paid a deposit. Nick was also leaving – but to Christchurch. He has a cousin there and his flatmate was leaving, so Nick moved into his old room. So Nick and I, who started together almost three months before, were also leaving at the same time. I was sad to leave, I hadn't expected to make such good friends during that last month.
The beginning of July
was birthdays galore. First it was Nalendra's birthday, and then
Dawn's (or Dawny as I now call her). I made cake for Nalendra, but he
never got any of it as he was always working, oops! On his actual
birthday, we went to see the new Transformers movie. On our return,
we saw that Nalendra and Ireka had made a birthday feast, so, at
nearly 11pm, we had a second dinner.
| Nalendra and his birthday spread! |
For Dawn's, we went to
Havelock North, back to the Irish/English pub for it. It was also the
pub's birthday and a big quiz night, so although we didn't win
anything (Sarah won a raffle prize though), we got two cakes! The
four of us had been to a quiz in our local bar in Napier before and
came top 5. Nick and I had been previously with one of the temporary
cleaners, Micaela, and came almost last. We knew going in that none
of us would be good at NZ politics and history! We always had the
same name: Jail House Rock!
For this night only, I
cheated. I ate cake that most likely had things in it which would
make me ill, but amazingly, I felt fine. When I was up at the bar, I
found out that birthday people in the pub get free cake! Not a slice,
but a whole small cake! So, after we'd eaten dinner, I told the bar
staff and during a break of the quiz, we sung happy birthday to Dawn
and she got her free cake! We also got anniversary cake from the bar!
Next was Nick's leaving
do, and then Mark's birthday coincided with my leaving day. I had my
leaving party on a Monday so that Nick could still be here and also
so anyone from the restaurant could go as it was closed on Mondays.
Only prison people came. Marion plus her daughter Bonnie and her
husband came along too, plus our little gang: me, Nick, Sarah, Mark
and Dawn. Nalendra was working again and Ireka usually went with him.
Any new person to the prison, ever since we had Sarah's leaving do
there, were introduced to Thai Express. Great Asian food on the cheap
– what's not to love?
| Nick and the sunrise |
| Ireka, Dawn, Nalendra, Nick, Mark, Me, Sarah, Marion |
That week, we also
played hide and seek in the dark! I was last to be found and must've
sat outside for half an hour. I was glad it was a dry night! Freaky
but fun! On Nick's last day, we all got up for the sunrise. We'd
found the wall key the day before. People used to go up there to
watch the hangings at the prison, paying 1 shilling for the
privilege. Those who watched down on the ground would pay 2
shillings! The view from the top of the wall is pretty good! I'm glad
we did it as a group, as I would never have managed to get up and
done it alone.
I was sad to leave
Napier and my “conjugal unit”, but I was looking forward to my
next adventure: Wellington for a long period of time. So, on the
Monday, Sarah and Mark drove down with me to the bus station. But not
before I'd gotten up early especially to make Mark's birthday cake –
one I would never get a slice of!
I'll write about
Wellington during the next few days, this blog is long enough!!
Thanks for reading, let me know what you think! xx



I made margaritas! Not mojitos :) Tho Mojitos sound good at the moment
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